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Writer's pictureGuy L. Culpepper, MD

Parody or nah?

Parody or nah?

To: Physicians and their Staff

From: Insurance Companies


We know by now that you’re at home sick, your offices are closed, partially closed, or you’re receiving this note in your own hospital bed.


So we’d like to thank you during this time of sacrifice and waive prior authorizations and referrals until your office is up and running again.


Frankly, we can’t even find enough caregivers this month to make it worth our cost to hassle you. So we’ve sent our admin staff home. We don’t really care what you do while we’re away.


We’d like to use this opportunity to market our company and further our public relations campaign by telling consumers how understanding we are to our providers.


We’ve also ramped up our ad dept focused on all the ways that PBMs are saving lives of Americans by denying those meds you write for them. We can use that money we save for our expensive lobbyists.


Don’t worry about your jobs. As soon as your office collapses under the cost of our admin burden, we plan to hire you.


Now heal up. We’ve got new rules for you when this crisis is over.


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